A classroom of American students explores the lasting effects and trauma of school shootings where the past and future begins to blend into a tragically common reality. When does it end?

Cast

STUDENT 1: Taiz Rodriguez

STUDENT 2: Gwendolyn Laub

STUDENT 3: Jake Schroeder

STUDENT 4: Laura Mahaniah

STUDENT 5: Emma Linderman

TEACHER: Sanjna Narayan

PARENT/POLITICIAN 1: James Nielson

POLITICIAN 2: Belle Hart

This piece was written and produced as my BA Thesis project at the University of Chicago for Theater and Performance Studies. I am excited to share this piece that has been living with me for almost seven years. In the aftermath of this life-altering tragedy, I used art to help me through my grief, and now I hope to use art again as a tool to continue to understand and heal my recurring pain.

We must do better for the future and honor those we could not protect in the past. Forever #AztecStrong🎗️

Foreward

On December 7th, 2017, the community of Aztec, NM and its neighbors lost two beautiful souls. A moment that changed the lives of many, including mine. As this horrific event was taking place, I was in a lockdown in the neighboring town praying for my friends. Aztec was my home for 12 years and I felt very close to it. I remember hearing about school shootings online and in passing conversations, but I never imagined it would become so real.

The air becomes thick with despair and when you look into the eyes of a stranger there is an unexplainable understanding. It could have been me. It could have been you. It could have been someone I knew. It was someone I knew. I was not close friends with Paco, but we had mutual friends. We had yearbook class together in seventh grade and I would see him walk the hallways. He was a gentle soul, and I think of him and his family often.

This type of trauma bonds you with people in the worst way possible. Trauma that makes you cry every time you hear a mention of death or the future. Trauma that sends you down a rabbit hole every time more innocent lives are lost. Every time the news reports another shooting, I go back to that day. I go back and remember how news outlets broadcast the numbers and the murderer's face then quickly moved on to the next.

I think about all the people I don’t know about who have been marked by an experience of gun violence at their schools but that never gained national attention. I think of my friends in Aztec who will grow up with this trauma that I cannot even begin to imagine. I think about how many people can be forever changed by one horrendous event beyond those we may initially think of. Mostly, I think about the sad reality that this loop will continue with seemingly no solution from those in power.

To the future children, I hope we find a solution for you. To my fifteen-year-old self, I’m sorry we didn’t have a solution then. I write this as part of my healing process for a piece of me that has been broken since that day.